Monday, December 26, 2005

Sai Baba Whoopie Cushioned, Furious

December 25th, 2005
Puttaparthi, India

"It was so quiet you could hear a japamala drop" said one witness after Sri Sathya Sai Baba sat down for Christmas Dinner and a loud PFFFFFT rang out. Prashanthi security is optimistic that they will catch the prankster who keeps playing practical jokes on the Avatar. Last week toy snakes sprang out of the Baba's glass of rosewater amrita knocking his Santa hat right off his head straight into the cheese fondue.

Some suggest that the perpetrator is Channel 4 TV, the same folks from Britain who made the BIG mistake of spraying Tom Cruise with water from a fake microphone last summer.

Channel 4 TV, kind of the Candid Camera for the 21st century routinely secretly films innocent celebrities as Channel 4 plays hilarious practical jokes on them. Prashanthi security has yet to locate any hidden cameras in the ashram but are cautiously on-guard.

One prankster who did get caught isn't talking. Almost a month ago ago he shook hands with Sai Baba who had to say three Gayatri mantras after the prankster's joy buzzer went off in the Baba's hand, this time shocking Sai Baba so that he fell straight into his own birthday cake.

"These seem to be mostly mealtime attacks" one ashram guard said adding, "that's a start .. a clue. "

"If someone is secretly filming these antics they will be prosecuted" ashram officials said. "Swami is not at all amused although he did get a mild chuckle out of the fake bullet holes found in his bedroom window next to his closet.

Guests at the ashram's Christmas dinner pretended nothing had happened after the Baba sat down at the table and the loud PFFFFFFT rang out, reverberating eerily throughout the dining hall.

One guest said, "I wanted to laugh but it being Swami I knew I shouldn't. Then all of a sudden a great big GUFFAW built up in my loins and I had to get up and flee the darshan compound. I barely made it out of the gate before the GUFFAW exploded out of my stomach, up through my larynx and out of my mouth. Before I knew it I was flat on my back reeling with laughter. I'm so ashamed. Excuse me but I think another Guffaw is bubbling up .. BAHAHAHAHAHA !!!!!!"

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