Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Sai Baba Applauds Gay Rights Advance

Sai Baba this afternoon cheered and applauded the news that Britain now allows same-sex couples to "marry" as new civil partnership legislation came into force.

As he read through the article in this morning's Deccan Herald with increasing excitement, he muttered under his breath about evoking the same situation in India.

"It's about time that this discrimination came to an end. That is the mission of the Avatar, to eradicate prejudice and envy from the hearts of men. Let them all do as they wish and let everyone's hearts be filled with gay and carefree love."

Being informed that his usage of the word 'gay' could be miscontrued by the general public, the Baba reiterated his position exclaiming, "So what?! That's exactly what I meant!"

The news refers to how lesbian couple Shannon Sickels and Grainne Close tied the knot earlier yesterday, thus assuring their position in gay rights history as the first "gay marriage" of Great Britain. Sai Baba sighed with obvious pleasure as he read that the couple left the City Hall in a pink cadillac. "I want one," he proclaimed, "as I'm getting bored of all these samey Mercs, Jaguars and golden chariots. For God's sake, I can't even drive that out on the road! What a waste of good cash that was!"

Almost 700 "gay marriages" are due to take place across England and Wales on Wednesday when arrangements for the new civil partnerships come fully into operation. Sai Baba intimated to me later that he was so steeped in bliss because of this news, that he was thinking of broaching this subject the next time Indian PM Manmohan Singh came to visit him. "If all goes well due to my willing it," he said, "then next year I can perform 81 gay marriages right here in the mandir as my birthday gift to these lowly people. That should spread my message to the international gay community and more devotees will come to see me and witness my ever-expanding glory."

Upon being asked if he had plans to marry should the situation change in India, Sai Baba responded, "Don't be stupid! I am a celibate guru! Get outta here!"

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