Sunday, March 21, 2004

NESBE Issues New Lawsuit Policy

NESBE Headquarters
March 20, 2004

We have instituted a new policy at the National Enquirer (Sai Baba Edition). We have decided to file lawsuits against any real persons or organizations that resemble those fictional ones mentioned in our stories. The closer the resemblance, the higher dollar amount of the suit. This will hopefully head off any lawsuits against our publication before they are filed against us. We firmly believe that in the world of tabloid journalism the best defense is a good offense. Let this be a warning to all resemblers to clean up their acts and change their lifestyles accordingly, or face legal consequences.

NESBE Head of Corporate Legal Affairs

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